Polar Express

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas! We sure did. While we don't bring Santa into our home (images or via gifts), we still allow Sam to see him outside. We took him on the Polar Express ride near Cherokee, NC the day after Christmas. We enjoyed giving him a gift that was intangible, so to speak, and will likely continue this tradition throughout his childhood.

If you know anything about Sam, you know that he LOVES trains. He got so many train-related toys this year from everyone. In fact, even though we didn't give him anything tangible ourselves, he had plenty of gifts from all of his admirers. He greatly enjoyed riding the Great Smokey Mountain Railroad.

The trip was reminiscent of the Polar Express book and movie. We sang songs all the way to the "North Pole." Santa got on the train and gave everyone a bell. Then we watched Santa get on his sled at the "North Pole" and drank hot chocolate and ate snacks while listening to the book being read on the way home.

It was really fun - but it took over three hours to get there and we did it in one day. Needless to say, Sam was absolutely exhausted by the time we got home.

Oh, but the drive was amazing. Cherokee, NC is a Native American Reservation and was amazing to see. Some day we'll have to take a trip over there just to hang out for a while.

Happy New Year!

Sam's Big New Year

A friend of ours in Australia (a Brugada Buddy) made this for Sam yesterday. We laughed so hard last night watching it, I thought I'd share it with you too. Thanks, Ollie!

For Papa Vic

We had a big loss in our family early this morning. Bill's grandfather, Papa Vic, passed away around 1am. He had leukemia, melanoma, congestive heart failure and pneumonia on top of all of it.

We are grieving the loss of a great man. Vic had so many accomplishments in his life, not least of which was his daughter, my mother-in-law, Gerry Ann. He was greatly involved in politics and even held office in Florida and was an entrepreneur - I can't even begin to list the amazing things he accomplished. Earlier last week, he was admitted to Bert Fish Medical Center and was able to see out of his window a bridge that he oversaw the construction of years ago, despite not having an engineering degree.

Vic was a great encourager to this family. He was very proud of his daughter and grandchildren. He especially loved the very unique connection he had with Sam - both being heart patients. Last Christmas we were able to visit him and he had a billion questions about Sam's defibrillator and he had done his own research on it as well, so he also had a billion things to tell us about it (much of which we didn't know). He always wrote us emails, even though they were short, about how much he enjoyed reading what I wrote - he thought I could even be a professional writer some day. That's the love and pride of a grandfather, isn't it?

Vic, Sam and Tootsie

The most wonderful thing about all of this is that he will live on in Gerry Ann. When I spent time with him last winter, I was shocked - SHOCKED - when I heard him laugh for the first time in years (as we had been away). Gerry Ann has the exact same laugh as her father. His laughter filled the room and my heart was filled with joy in knowing that they shared something so special.


We will miss you greatly, Papa Vic. We love you. Our hearts are with Tootsie, Bill's grandmother, as she grieves the loss of her husband.

I really hope my next post isn't dedicated to anyone else. Our family can't take much more sadness this holiday season.

For Jane

Fear not, I have not quit blogging. I've just too busy to sit down and blog.

A good friend of mine passed away last night. She battled with cancer and the cancer finally won. It really saddens me to be without her in this world, but she was a believer in Jesus Christ and the real battle was won last night for her. I know she is in heaven worshiping the Lord today and she is finally cancer free. I also know she has finally be reunited with her husband, who died on January 3rd just this year. Also a friend.

She meant a great deal to our family and she loved Sam like her own grandchild. She will be sorely missed.

She was always thinking of our family, even to the point of sending Sam a Christmas gift just last week. She could read people very quickly and had a very discerning spirit. She was a great confident as well, and I was priveledged to be hers.

Bill, Sam and I will be heading back to Raleigh for only the second time since we moved away. It's a sad occasion to return, but I greatly want to be with others who loved her and will miss her as I will.

So, this post is for Jane. I love you and am a better person for knowing your love for me and my family. I already miss you.

Musings

I wrote a post earlier today that I then deleted, because I am not sure that I articulated myself well enough.

I want to understand this whole blog thing - I have my reasons for writing this blog, not the least of which is to educate on Brugada Syndrome. However, I also am including lots of personal stories and fun facts about our lives.

In the process, I think that folks who used to keep up with us via email or telephone still feel like they (you) are connected to us. I think it is a bit one-sided though.

I'm definitely not explaining myself very well.

I appreciate everyone who has left comments and has prayed for our family. Thank you. For those of you who remain silent, I appreciate your keeping up with us as well. If I haven't heard from you in a while, feel free to drop us an email or leave a comment (I won't publish) telling us what's going on with you. I guess I'm saying all of this because I've noticed a drop in communication from our old friends since we moved here and have been keeping up the blog. Maybe you feel like you know what's going on with us, but I don't know what's going on with you!

One final note: I actually only highlight what's been going on with us here - there are many more personal things happening in our lives that I choose not to make public for obvious reasons. This blog is not an effective way to know what's happening in our lives.

Chopping Block

When we first moved into this house, I greatly desired a chopping block. My father, a wood-worker, helped me figure out what kind of block I would need - he suggested an edge-grain and said that when I cut on it, it will push itself back together. If he were here in America, I feel sure he'd make one for me, but, alas, he is not. Once I started pricing them, however, I realized it was beyond my reach.

Then I had the opportunity to participate in a free blogger giveaway that my fellow blogger Nan posted on her blog (sadly, I didn't win). Her friend Melissa and her husband (also friends of my brother, Adam, from college) had recently started their own business. When I saw that Randy had made a farmer's table that was really beautiful, I thought maybe he could make me a chopping block.

I contacted them, and sure enough, he could...and did! For a fraction of the cost, but the workmanship is excellent. I told him everything I wanted/desired in a chopping block, including edge-grain, and a drawer, along with slats at the bottom. He designed it himself, with my desires in mind, and I finally picked it up yesterday in Greensboro.

With no further ado, I present my brand new chopping block, hand-crafted by Randy Lewkowicz.

Melissa also does jewelry, bags and other hand-crafted items. Just from looking around their house I could tell they are extremely talented.

Here's my chopping block in its new home - the middle of my kitchen. I can tell Bill isn't completely on board with it being in his way yet, but I'll use it to make a few pies and cut some veggies and I'm sure I can win him over.

It is almost too nice - I can tell I need to redo my kitchen now that there's something with such good workmanship in it! Pay no attention to the ancient cabinets and handles.

If you would like to see what else they have available or to contact them about something you have in mind to make, check out their website and write them an email! They are definitely great folks and I wholeheartedly recommend them for any project you've got in mind.

Cardiology Update

Just a quick update to let you know about our visit to Greensboro.

Aside from torrential rains on the way there and home, not to mention 8 hydroplanes (thank goodness for AWD), the visit was a good one. Sam's defibrillator is working as well as it can in his little body, all the numbers were good. His heartbeat obviously still looks different from a "normal" heartbeat, but it keeps his body alive and this is only a problem when it comes to the sensitivity of the device. In case you didn't know, his R and T-waves are backwards - and unless you know something about hearts, this won't make any sense to you.

Sam did great as three different doctors listened to his heart. Then Dr. Buck used leads and connected him to the "interrogator." I love that name. It's this laptop device that has a magnet connected to it and can read everything that his defibrillator has recorded for the last three months. Great invention.

We learned that one of the residents who treated Sam after his febrile seizures is going to publish a paper in a medical journal about complex febrile seizure and Brugada Syndrome, along with Dr. Buck. Of course, Sam will be anonymous, but I have asked for a copy so I can post it. It sounds like we are really getting out a lot of information about Brugada - which is one of the points of my blog, but I have also made it clear to Dr. Buck that anything we can do to help - count us in!

Also, we learned that they have still not located the genetic marker that carries Sam's particular form of Brugada. It may take them years to locate it, since it wasn't on the normal three genetic markers that only 20% of other Brugada patience have. We'll continue to wait for that.

I believe that is all. Please let me know if you have any questions. I'm exhausted and don't think I'm making sense.

Off to the Cardiologist

We're on our way to Greensboro today to see Sam's cardiologist. It's just a routine visit, but I have some very important questions to ask him, so it may be enlightening to our future.

I've had a difficult time trying to explain to Sam his condition lately. He has taken to running his fingers down his scar when we take his shirt off and saying, "uh oh, Mama, a boo boo." I've used the word "zipper" with him before, but I'm not sure how I really feel about it - it sort of implies that we're going to open him back up again. I'm going to talk to Dr. Buck about other ways to approach this or other words to call it. I've told him it's his scar and emphasized it's not a "boo boo" but instead a blessing from God. But, I also know that there is a world of heart patients who use their own phrases for this kind of thing and I want him to be able to communicate with them one day too.

I've also showed him this video that Mark O'Shea, a country singer, put together. He highlights patients at Vanderbilt Hospital when they were little and as they grow (some are still little) and then shows that he himself was a patient. I just want Sam to see that he is not alone.

Any insight is welcomed.

David and Goliath

We have a very succinct routine every night in our household:

6pm Dinner
6:50pm Bath time
7pm Brush teeth
7-7:15pm Read three books
7:15pm In bed, lights out, pray

Usually we can leave the room with no problems. Bill is almost always a part of story time, and if he's home, he always lays down in Sam's bed with him to pray and say goodnight, while I kneel beside him. Lately, Sam's been getting upset and begging one of us to tell a story before we leave. I'm not sure why, but I am usually the story teller. When it falls on Bill, he always tells a Bible story, but when it's my turn, I usually just make one up. I really love that Bill tells so many Bible stories, so I decided to tell one last night (Bill didn't get home until well after Sam was already in bed).

When I make a story up, I usually ask Sam to help finish it. It's like that new movie "Bedtime Stories" (which I cannot wait to see!) when Adam Sandler is asking his niece and nephew what happens next. (I think I may have even found a babysitter for when it comes out, but I'm not holding my breath - we may just have to wait for the DVD, as with every other movie. But, I digress)

So, when I started telling the story of David and Goliath last night, here's what came of it:

Me: A long long time ago, there was a boy named David and he had a lot of brothers. His brothers were far away one day when his father asked him to take them a meal. When David got there, he learned they were fighting the Philistines. And do you know what he found?

Sam: A giant! (he knows this story well)

Me: That's right. And David was surprised that the Israelites allowed the Philistines to insult his God, so he wanted to fight the giant. When King Saul heard that David wanted to fight Goliath, the giant, do you know what he did?

Sam: He ate raspberries!

Me: (giggling a little) Well, I don't know, I suppose he could have offered him raspberries. But, what he also did was to offer his very own armor. But do you know what? The armor was too big. So what did David do?

Sam: More raspberries?

Me: No. No raspberries.

Sam: Apples?

Me: No. No apples...He picked up five smooth stones and slung one in his sling shot and hit the giant right in between his eyes and killed him. And do you know what happened to David?

Sam: Ride the horsies!

Me: Probably. Because he became one of Saul's most trusted men after that.

Sam: Do it again. Tell the story again! Cows! Apples? Okay, Mama?

Me: Night night Sam. Now you can tell your teddy bear the same story.

Sam: (Holding up his teddy bear) Kiss now!

So, I kissed his teddy bear good night and kissed Sam good night and left the room. An hour and a half later, when Bill came home, I told Bill he needed to go say good night to Sam (because I had promised it in one of my deal-makings earlier in the evening). Bill went in and Sam, who was still awake but lying still, promptly told Bill to kiss his teddy good night.

And then he fell asleep.

You're Not Going To Believe This

I have told so many people about Sam's ability to recognize the letters of the alphabet. As much as people want to believe me, I think they don't fully. So, I decided to get it on video today.



Alright, so he's not spelling his name for the camera, but it's only because he's so excited about all the other things he can type. I swear he knows how to spell his name too.

Last week in Myrtle Beach, we all went to Brookgreen Gardens. While we were there, we ate at the Pavilion Restaurant on the grounds. I stole an oyster cracker from my Uncle Patrick while he wasn't looking and handed it to Sam, who promptly said, "wook, Mama, a hexagon." I kid you not.

We had even had a conversation about a hexagon two weeks ago. Sam said something was a hexagon, but I corrected him and said it was an octagon. Bill promptly corrected me and said six sides is a hexagon, eight is an octagon. Um, yeah, I knew that. Just testing everyone.

It was that afternoon that the whole family and I decided it wouldn't be prudent for me to home school - he will likely surpass me in intelligence by the first grade. But, hey, at least I can blog about it!

Doctor Visit

I don't normally do this, but I would like to complain for a moment about a doctor's visit I had today. No, it wasn't for Sam, it was for me. Bill took off a little early from work and stayed home with Sam so I could finally visit a specialist about a problem I've had for about two years now.

I read recently that many women won't visit doctors for even the slightest problem because the weighing station isn't discreet enough. I, personally, don't care where it is and even thought this when I read the article. How naive I was.

It was a perfectly normal doctor's visit - I had to fill out paperwork, the doctor was running 45 minutes behind and the lady at the counter needed a copy of my insurance card, etc. It all started falling apart when the nurse came out to get me.

Nurse: "Teresa Klear?"

Me (looking around): "I'm TEESA Klear."

Nurse: "No, I'm looking for Teresa Klear." (speaking louder and over my head now) "TERESA KLEAR?"

Me: "My last name is Klear, but my first name is TEESA."

Nurse: "No, TERESA." (looks down at the paper) "Oh, whoops, Teesa."

This is not an unusual start to any doctor's visit, but she did speak with a little more gusto than I am accustomed to. We then traveled back to the exam rooms and I found myself staring at the scales. She instructed me to get on. I placed my heavy winter coat and purse on the chair next to the scales and took my shoes off.

I then stepped onto the scales.

The scales were typical doctor's office scales, as seen above.

The nurse, of Asian decent, immediately flipped the bottom weight to 150 pounds.

Then she started fiddling with the top one - I suppose she was wondering why it wasn't balancing correctly. You see, I am 125 pounds. There was no way she was going to get it to work properly if she kept the lower weight on 150 pounds. I felt a little affronted at this point - I mean, did this woman actually think I weighed more than 150 pounds? I know I've gained some holiday weight, but come on.

She then figured out her mistake and moved the lower weight back to the 100 pound mark, but, with what I now know is her usual gusto, she slid the upper weight all the way to the right - to equal...yes, that's right 150 pounds. Eventually she slid it back to the 30 mark and then finally put it at 129, where it was obviously not balanced properly (the little tab was touching the bottom of the square cut-out). Then, she proudly looked me in the eyes and practically shouted, "You weigh 129 pounds. 1 - 2 - 9."

What is that about? I don't really scare if I way 129 pounds or not - honestly. But, does such a big deal have to be made about it?

She then led me into my exam room and it was there that I had to pray to God to let me treat her with kindness. Up to this point I had kept my mouth shut (with the obvious exception of correcting her about my name).

Fortunately, I didn't have to deal with her again.

As to my name being mispronounced, the doctor did it once and the lady at the check-out counter repeated the same mistake.

Should I put my confidence in an office whose entire staff is illiterate? You tell me.

To be honest with you, it wasn't an altogether unpleasant experience. The doctor was very sweet, as well as her personal nurse and I even saw someone who goes to my church there (I had never properly met her before).

But, I can now understand why some women choose to stay at home than to visit a doctor's office where her weight is announced for everyone to hear. I'm learning.

Crawford Reunion 2008

We are back from Myrtle Beach! We had a fantastic time visiting with all my relatives over Thanksgiving. It wouldn't be the Klear Life blog if I didn't include some food photos, so I'll start with those.



The day after Thanksgiving, my daddy's cousin drove with my brother to Wilmington and picked up two bushels of oysters. Our family loves to cook and we don't just cook your ordinary mundane items. If we're going to do it, we'll do it right. They cooked them up and then we spread them out on newspaper and just dug in. We ate until our eyes were bursting and then we had our second course, around 10pm...


...a low-country boil! Sausage, corn and shrimp boiled with some spices make the most amazing meal. We spread that out across the table too and, again, dug in.

On Thanksgiving Day, we ate fried turkey, smoked pork butt, and various side dishes. It was so delicious we could barely eat all the desserts we made. In fact, it took us three more days to finish off all the desserts!

Our hotel was right on the beach, so we got to have a few walks to collect sea shells and enjoy the ocean. Sam didn't want to keep any shells, he only wanted to throw them back into the ocean.

Cousin John, me, Uncle Patrick, Uncle Brian, Sam and Aunt Nancy

My parents couldn't make it, because they're in Thailand, so we really missed them. All of Daddy's surviving brothers and sister were there, plus cousins and my great aunts and uncle. It was a special time to remember why we are thankful. It was especially neat for me to see those whom we have grafted into our family, whether by adoption or by marriage.

I got to spend some time with my new nephew Crawford too. We put the boys together and took a few fun photos while Crawford's mommy and daddy were out.

I think they both enjoyed each other. The Winnie the Pooh doll that Crawford is holding has some meaning. When I was on bed rest with Sam, my Daddy's cousin Jan bought one for Sam. She sent it all the way to Hong Kong for me and told me her daughter had enjoyed a similar one when she was little. Jan passed away last year (we miss her dearly), but I bought one for Crawford to have in her honor. It appears that he loves his Pooh Bear, and I think Jan would be thrilled.

I'll post more pictures soon, I just wanted to give some of the highlights for now. I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving too.

Adoption update: It looks like we won't be hearing anything for another two weeks. I'll continue to update you as I know more.