"The Caress"

Earlier today Sam and I were reading his book "365 Days of Baby Einstein." It contains all kinds of cultural learning tools, including paintings. Sam and I both love this book.

We checked out "The Caress" by Mary Cassatt, painted in 1902 and I asked him all the accompanying questions:

• Point to the baby's belly button. Can you find your own belly button?
• Look at the girl kissing the baby. Do you think she's the baby's older sister?
• What do you think these girls are named?

To which he responded:

The little girl's name is Lilly Baye (a little girl we played with in playgroup this morning). The baby is Madi (a friend from church who is his age). The woman - well, she's Joanna, our next door neighbor.

Joanna, if you're reading this, I want you to know how much Sam loves you. He obviously sees you as a loving and caring woman who is beautiful inside and out. He's right, you know.

I wish I could see everyone through Sam's eyes.

Innocence

We finally had a sunny day yesterday, so I took Sam out to blow bubbles.



He refuses to go outside without his Thomas jacket on. Yes, Nan, if you are reading this, it used to be one of your boy's jackets. Can you believe it resides in the mountains now?
Just in case you were wondering, this is what it looks like just before he pees in his pants. He was having too much fun to go inside. I told him to stop, so he did, then I let him finish in the yard, without his pants on. He never let go of his rock and stick. What a boy.

Last night Bill was telling Sam that he was rough and tumble and such a boy, to which Sam replied, "No, Daddy! I'm cuuuute - I'm a girl."

Needless to say, I was accused of teaching him all the wrong things during the day. What can I say? I think the problem is that Bill is teaching him only girls are cute and boys are rough and tumble. It can work both ways, you know...

My job today is to teach him that he's cute AND a boy. Later, I'll teach him that he's rough and tumble and cute and I guess, eventually, I'll have to lose the "cute" all together.

Ahh, the joys of parenting! I love it!

Breakfast Casserole

I don't know about you, but around here things have gotten mighty stressful. It seems like the majority of my friends are facing difficult times as well. Just yesterday, we had a playgroup over here and every one of us was struggling with something life-changing.

So, when the going gets tough at my house, the "tough" gets cooking. Another friend of mine, who suffered a great loss just last week, recently shared her recipe for breakfast casserole with me.

You know me, I can't ever just let a recipe stand on its own. I had to tweak it and add my own flare to it, but it turned out beautifully.

I made my own breakfast sausage where I was supposed to add "browned ground meat." Here's the recipe for that (it tastes better with ground pork, but I use ground turkey to be a bit healthier).

Breakfast Sausage:

2 t sage
2 t salt
1 t black pepper
1/4 t marjoram
1 T brown sugar
1/8 t crushed red pepper flakes (I usually double that)
1 pinch ground cloves
2 lbs ground turkey (or pork)

In a small bowl combine the spices. Place pork in a large bowl and add the spices. Mix well with your hands and form into patties (or just brown it, as per the recipe below). Saute patties in large skillet over medium heat about 5 minutes per side or until internal pork temperature reaches 160F (70C).

Breakfast Casserole

• Wipe down inside of crock pot with cooking oil
• place 1/2 bag of frozen shredded hash brown inside (separated kind, not already formed)
• in a separate bowl, lightly beat 7 eggs with some milk, salt and pepper
• stir in 2 handfuls of shredded cheese into eggs
• stir browned ground meat (can be leftovers from dinner too!) into egg mixture
• Pour over hash browns
• Turn on low and cook 6-8 hours (i.e. overnight)

My wonderful neighbor had her husband bring over 6 dozen eggs last week. To my GREAT delight, there was a turkey egg in the mix, as well as many Americauna eggs (they are blue/green and long). You should have seen Sam and I jumping for joy when we found the turkey egg! I love turkey eggs, but only because Joanna introduced me to them. They make the best pastry crusts, and taste great all on their own (very bold flavor). However, Sam wanted to include it in our casserole, so I added it to the mix.

He greatly enjoys mixing eggs. We prepared this casserole after dinner last night, and it turned out to be a great way to wind down the evening for him. He's a very task-oriented child, so once I gave him this task, he didn't stop until he was satisfied that all the eggs were mixed properly.

Meanwhile, I browned the sausage in my cast-iron skillet. Turkey seems to take a little longer to cook than beef or pork does. I don't know what the science is behind it, but it could be because it sticks together more than the other meats. I actually ended up using my brand new pastry blender to separate the meat into smaller bites.

This morning, I toasted an English muffin that I had frozen and thawed overnight and served the casserole over it. The results were delicious.

As we say to Sam all the time, "Try it, you'll like it!"

Meatal Stenosis

Sam likes to keep us hopping here. I was just telling a friend about how the last three weeks have seemed to be filled with me putting out "fires" here and there. Just as the adoption "crisis" was winding up, we got an email about our storage unit in China. The lease is running out in March and I needed to get money to the appropriate people, or at least tell them where to get the money. That's still not fully resolved, but we hope that the new lease won't increase the cost too much. In the midst of all of this, we're refinancing our home, which has taken a lot of logistical work to get done. Believe me, we're getting a good deal, but it is very detailed work. We close tomorrow and I suppose that means a new "fire" needed to start raging.

Sam has a new diagnosis as of this morning: meatal stenosis. Apparently, (stop reading if you are squeamish or get embarrassed easily), he got a small infection on the tip of his penis. As it started to heal itself, it began to close the opening to his urethra. The pediatrician said that in normal boys this is just an "annoyance" that can be taken care of easily. The tip is swabbed with a numbing agent, then injected with anesthesia, then the urologist will crush the tip and then use scissors to cut the opening back open.

The pediatrician said this usually takes less than two minutes. But, in Sam's case, things are never so easy. He cannot have normal anesthesia because of his arrhythmia. Therefore, his pedi needs to consult with his cardiologist who needs to locate a pediatric urologist who can handle this case. We still don't know exactly HOW it's going to be handled either. But, I will let you know as I do.

This is a common problem in boys who are circumcised. But, it's the ONLY problem in boys who are circumcised, so the doctor told me. He said boys who are uncircumcised don't have this issue, but have many many more issues.

So, please pray for Sam and his doctors. This will be a great learning experience for all of us, as it will show us on a small-scale how we will handle future anesthesia related issues with Sam. If we return overseas, this will be a great learning experience.

Restructuring

I decided to restructure my blog just a little bit. I know that it's still snowing here in the mountains, but I'm really hoping for some changing of seasons soon. So, I thought if I changed my blog, it might at least feel like Spring while we're online.

The above photo is of my Great Aunt Joyce, who lives in South Carolina. She has always been like a grandmother to me, since my real grandmother, her younger sister, died when I was just two. She's done a great job of loving me and keeping up with me, as well as convincing her wonderful church to love us too. I thought the photo was appropriate since it shows Sam being loved on by family.

I've also added a "donate" button by PayPal on the left. We have had lots of people ask if they can help with the adoption, and I thought this might be an easy way to contribute. BUT, we also have something in the works for a real product that my friend and I are going to market and sell here. I will have more details on that to come.


For now, enjoy an after-bath smile taken a few minutes ago. I know he needs a haircut, but I LOVE the shaggy look. He was warming up in front of the monitor heater.

Fingerprinting Again...

We got back last night from our little trip to Charlotte to do our immigration fingerprinting. The appointment went really well and the folks at the office were very nice. They are clearly not the same folks who set up the appointment via email.

Thanks to everyone who prayed for us about this. Now we just sit and wait for a call that we've been matched, which is sort of what we were doing before anyway. The fingerprinting renewal issue came up while we were waiting.

We are hopeful that we'll be matched in March, but maybe it will be more like April. Our agency didn't have anyone matched early this month and I'm thinking it must have been related to the Chinese New Year. Once we are matched with our little girl (no, we don't know her yet), we will travel 5-8 weeks later to pick her up. During that time I'm sure we'll be scrambling to get clothes, bedding and everything else together. But, until then, we're not doing anything prematurely. We just wait.

Anyone else have a story about waiting they'd like to share with us? God can speak to us through waiting in so many ways.

Appointment Set

We finally have confirmation that we've got an appointment at 8am in Charlotte for our fingerprints to be renewed. Wow. I'll breathe a sigh of relief when they are officially done.

We'll spend the night in Charlotte and maybe even go to the new Ikea that is opening there after the appointment. I saw on the news today that people are already camping out to be the first in. It's below freezing, so I'm not sure where their motivation comes from.

Sam had some blood in his urine on Saturday night. We saw the doc yesterday and we are hoping some topical medicine will help heal him. If he's not better by next Monday, we may be looking at a surgical procedure to fix the problem. I'm hopeful that it's not going to come to that, he already seems to be getting better.

I keep forgetting to mention that my great Aunt Lou introduced me to an amazing product called Nok-out. It gets rid of odors in clothes and around the house. She gave me a free sample of it at Thanksgiving and Bill promptly used it on our diaper pale.

You are not going to believe me, but it completely took the smell away. We are now using Sam's diaper pale as a garbage can and we don't have to evacuate his room every time we open it up. It is amazing stuff. You can go here to see what it's all about. I don't normally endorse products on here, but this one is amazing and I really stand behind it. Check it out.

It's environmentally safe and safe to use around children too. That's great for us, since we make all our own cleaning products in this household.

Senator

Wow, thanks for all the emails, comments and phone calls we've gotten in the last few days. We are overwhelmed with everyone's support and friendship.

The fingerprinting issue still has not been resolved, but it appears they are going to try to "move mountains" to get it done in the appropriate time. Apparently all appointments are made electronically and there is no way to manually change them. Believe me, when all is said and done and we actually have these fingerprint renewals registered in the system, my senator is going to get an ear full. I cannot believe how parents adopting are treated. I am hesitant to contact my senator right now, because I don't want to hurt our chances of them actually moving those mountains, but...well, I have a lot to say when we're done.

One of the commenters, Leslie, suggested looking back at some journals to remind ourselves of our motivation and calling to adopt. I think she is spot on in suggesting this. I haven't ever heard of any international adopter who hasn't gone through some difficulties, especially with red tape, but it still feels like we're the first ones to do this - as though we're re-inventing the wheel or something.

But, there are hundreds and thousands of adopters out there who have gone through so much more than we have endured, waited longer, and have received their child in the end. What a blessing that God has called us to walk this path, to grow us in His wisdom and knowledge and to encourage us with friends like you, who aren't afraid to speak up when God shares something.

On a less heavy note, Sam is doing great. We're on our way to the pedi this morning for another Synagis shot. This is his monthly shot to prevent RSV (estimated at ~$1000-5000 per shot!). Thank goodness for a low co-pay! He's doing great with his potty training, although we did have a mishap at a friend's house the other day.

One of the best ways for a little boy to use a "big" potty (like at a friend's house or a restaurant) is to face him backwards on it. It's brilliant! A woman at our church told me about how she used to do this with her son when he was little. So, while we were at our friend's house, I had Sam backwards on the potty, but when I lifted him up to get him off the potty, he dipped his foot in the water! It was gross. Other than that, we're really enjoying the freedom of big boy undies and the simplicity of going potty anywhere without having to worry about whether or not there is a changing station. Yeah for Sam!!

Fingerprinting

I have been overwhelmed this last week with the items on our plate. The heaviest item is a fingerprinting issue we've been having.

We need to get our fingerprints "renewed" because they expire on March 20th. This is all for the adoption. This is also the third time we'll have to have renewed them - they apparently expire every 18 months.

I cannot go into the details too much, but let's just say the immigration office in Charlotte is being extremely uncooperative. Here it is, one week later, and they have assigned us a time that is unacceptable, nay, impossible, for us to keep.

We have had issues at every step of this adoption process. We still firmly believe that God has called us to adopt and are not going to give up because of a small hindrance, or a hundred small OR large hindrances, but it is beginning to be difficult to bear it all.

Pray for us that we would give this all to the Lord. We know that He will provide all that we need, and even work out a tiny appointment "glitch," but I really need His assurance right now that it will happen.

If you have some encouraging words for us, please email us or leave it in the comments, but please, do not post anything that says we should give up. I have heard enough of that - we are NOT going to give up just because the road is not easy. We know more than ever that this is what the Lord wants for us to pursue and we know that there is a little girl out there who is waiting for her family to come get her.

I am sorry to complain or whine about this, but I need some prayers right now. My heart is aching that my own government is making it difficult for us to bring an orphan into our home and love her forever.

Ollie?

Just a quick note for my friend Oliver. Can you write me an email - I lost your email address when my computer died and we still haven't been able to fix it?







We made Beth's Teddy Bears, but I forgot to add the noses, so they look more like Koala bears (as Shannon pointed out). It was a fun treat to play with the dough. Sam loved it! We made it from scratch - just a sweet dough recipe I found online. They went really well with our roasted chicken and sweet potatoes that evening.

Shoebox Computer

Sam is loving the desktop computer these days. He loves to play "ABCs" as he calls it, on http://www.starfall.com/. It's an amazing program my friend Beth introduced to us.

Today we made a shoebox computer. I gave him an old CD I found in the garbage (Bill just doesn't think creatively when he throws things away) and made a slot for it. Then I put a book above it as a "screen." He LOVES it. So cheap, so easy. It's the simple things, really...

Brrrr Blue Jay

We've been having a blast over here continuing with our potty training and doing lots of creative projects. We're going to try Beth's Three Bear Bread today too (with homemade dough).

It snowed yesterday and it's going to be a cold one today. It is about 5 degrees right now, up from 3 when I awoke. Unfortunately, Sam woke up coughing a couple times last night, so we can't play in it today. Maybe he'll be better tomorrow. No fever that I am aware of though.

This is our backyard. It gently slopes downhill and is perfect for sledding. Too bad we won't use it today.

There are two blue jays who have taken up residence in our pear tree. I saw this one this morning had dug a small circle in the snow looking for food. Wish I had Bill's telephoto lens on to capture the moment better.

Oh, and here's Sam up to no good. I only left him for a moment to allow him some privacy and he emptied the entire roll of TP. What a mess!

We started reading Robinson Crusoe to Sam last night. It surprised both Bill and me when Sam loved it. Especially when I mentioned pirates early in the first chapter! He wanted to talk more about the storm that tossed ship around too. I'll continue reading it to him over the next couple weeks. I've never read it myself, so I'm enjoying it too.

Baby Legs

I am positive I'm late getting on board with Baby Legs, but I just want to say how much I love them. Last week, the day after we started potty training, my friend Trish gave us two pairs of these lovely leg warmers for babies. I had seen another friend of mine's little girl in hers when she first brought her home from Vietnam, but we never owned a pair.


For potty training in the middle of winter with COLD toilet seats, these Baby Legs have been a savior!! Sam can wear them on his legs and they protect him from getting too cold, thus relaxing him a bit to be able to potty faster. Thanks again, Trish!

I promised to type up our methods for potty training, so that is mainly what this post will be devoted to.

Here's what I started with:

• A big bag of M&Ms (put in a small container in both bathrooms)
• A potty chart
• Stickers, lots of stickers
• A converter seat with stool
• About 12 pairs of undies, washed and ready to go
• Pull-ups interactive DVD
• Pampers free potty training kit
• Other DVDs about potty training or other online videos (Elmo has an okay one)
• Big prizes for big feats

We decided to forgo the pull-ups altogether. But, both Pampers and Huggies have free giveaways that are very useful to potty training. Huggies has an interactive DVD that has coloring pages you can print out and Pampers has stickers, trophies and charts in their free giveaway.

We started talking about using the potty months ago. We borrowed a friend's Elmo Potty Training DVD and let Sam watch it a couple times, we used his stuffed Elmo doll to show how Elmo can sit on the potty and, much to Bill's chagrin, we let him watch Daddy going potty.

When it came time for the big day, I turned on our Pull-ups DVD and let Sam hear everyone talking about using the potty - big boys and girls whom he looked up to. Then I sat him on the potty for long periods of time until he tinkled a little bit. I made such a big deal about it and we started our routine:

• flush
• put undies and pants back on
• wash hands
• dry hands
• get an M&M
• put a sticker on his chart (included in the Pampers package)

After ten stickers, he got a big prize (a miniature monster truck). After the first time he had a BM, he also got a big prize (another truck) and we got to dance together with the music blaring (for him, anyway). We also made that video, since he loves to look at himself on the computer screen. If it was an especially big deal to get him on the potty (like he was crying or resisting in some way) he would get an extra sticker or a phone call to Daddy to tell him what he did.

We colored the coloring pages we printed off from the DVD too. We talked about it all day. If he had an accident, I didn't yell at him, but instead I told him it was okay but that we needed to go in the potty next time so we didn't mess up Thomas (or Diego - whoever was on his undies).

During the first three days I gave him a ton of liquids - normally I give him a cup of water with a tablespoon of juice, but on these days I gave him half water half juice, so he would drink more than usual. I also took him to the potty every 30 minutes all day. While he sat on the potty, especially during the first day, I would say, "shhh, do you hear that?" He always answered, "what Mommy?" to which I would say, "it's the sound of Sam going pee pee." And then he would look down and go pee pee. It was soon like Pavlov's dog! I could just say "do you hear that?" and he would go.

Again, I'm no expert on potty training, but I AM an expert on Sam. I know that he was ready to potty train a couple weeks ago because he was recognizing when he needed a new diaper and because he asked to use the potty a couple times. But, he wasn't doing some of the other things the "books" say he should be doing, like pulling down his own pants or staying dry during nap time.

Sam has always been a heavy wetter, at nighttime and in the daytime. I know he needs to go to the potty a lot more than other kids, so I haven't been letting him wait too long. If he tells me he needs to go now, we go - no questions asked and no matter when he tells me (like if he's in bed). But, we're still at the point now that I need to take him about once an hour, with or without his request. I never ask him if he has to go, I just tell him it's time. If I ask him, he will always say no. I also let him bring whatever toy he wants to the potty with him (especially if he's resisting because he wants to play with it).

It was pretty tough and we're obviously still working on it. By no means have we perfected it, but I believe we've done a good job. We're stilling using cloth diapers for nap time and bedtime, but they feel similar to regular undies, so if he goes in them he gets upset. I will work on nap time and bedtime after we've perfected daytime dryness.

Thanks to Caroline for her encouragement and her own blogging about it - it really gave me the push I needed. In fact, the one thing she wrote in her blog that made me realize we can do this was that she got a ton of undies for her son and they would go through all of them until he recognized what was supposed to happen. It just clicked with me after that. I had been under the false assumption that we wouldn't even begin potty training until Sam was ready to not have any accidents, or at least less than two a day. I don't know why I thought that, but I don't anymore. Caroline's son is a day younger than Sam, so that was a great encouragement as well (not to mention he has two other friends, one a boy and one a girl, who are his age who have been potty trained for months now).

Just for fun - this is what exercising with Sam is like. He's always under-foot, or on top of us in some way!